Thanksgiving is, of course, a day to give thanks. As I woke up on Thanksgiving morning I knew it was going to be a quiet day. My ex had the kids and they were going to make a vegetarian Thanksgiving meal. I was fine with this – I have the kids a majority of the time and it only seemed right to allow him to celebrate with the kids. My ex does have a girlfriend; a girlfriend with 9 kids. When we discussed Thanksgiving (a nice civil conversation) I clearly told him that he was welcome to have the kids at his house for Thanksgiving but if he decided to go to his girlfriend’s house, I wanted the kids with me. She already has a large family and she has two kids that drive our kids crazy! Even sweet, gentle Lucy who likes most people isn’t very fond of one of the girlfriend’s daughters. He agreed with me.
Maybe you’ve already guessed what happened. I was awakened by a call from Kaileigh complaining that she didn’t want to go to HER house. I told her that Daddy and I agreed that would not happen. She told me that he had already started bagging things up to take to her house for the Thanksgiving meal. Being a trusting soul, I called Robert and casually asked how the food prep was going. He told me that he was going to her house for the meal – that it was just too much for him to do all by himself. Forget the part that he has done it for the last number of years – it is better for me not to dwell on that at the moment! I ask if I should come get the kids and of course, he pretends we never had the conversation about going to her house. Then he had the nerve to tell me that there was a lot of love in her house.
So it turns out that I spent the early part of the day feeling sorry for myself. Grumping around, moping and napping as desired. But slowly but surely, I started thinking about what it means to be thankful. While I wanted to dwell on what is wrong in my life, I didn’t want to go in that spiral of downward bliss!
My list started with being grateful that I do have a roof over my head – that isn’t saying anything about the floor under my feet but there is definitely a roof over my head! The kids are healthy, doing well in school and I’m super grateful not to be married to my ex anymore. That fact kind of saddens me because it dashes all that optimism that I had on my wedding day but the man I married no longer existed. And it may surprise a number of people, but I’m thankful that he has someone in his life that makes him happy.
There is so much more in life for which to be thankful than there is to complain about. Sometimes I shake my head over setting a day aside just to give thanks but then I look around and realize that it is good to slow down, look around, and count your blessings. In fact, maybe we should set aside more days for giving thanks……….