I have a major problem with management – time management, money management, task management – you name it, I can’t manage it.  The time management issue is why my blog posts are sooooo sporadic.  Most days I think about something to post but time flies by and it is time for me to go to bed.  Well to be honest, it gets to be past time to go to bed.  I never go to bed as early as I fantasize. And how sad is that?  My entire fantasy life deals with what time I’ll get to sleep!  Or what time I’ll get to take a nap – it almost exclusively revolves around sleeping!  But how weird is it that the things that I most look forward to doing I put off as long as I can?  My feeble reasoning is that I can prolong the anticipation of the event and it is nice to have something to which I can look forward.

I’ll admit that my present life doesn’t have much joy in it.I would go so far as to say it is more of a struggle than anything else. And it is exhausting to be in this cycle of angst.  This is due to my poor money management skills.  Within three days of a payday, my money is gone.  And then the next 10 days I limp by trying to make it to the next payday.  It would be one thing if I was going out and buying clothes or cars or anything that brings pleasure to life but all I’m doing is trying to keep up with bills.  I have a daughter that is ill and her illness contributed to some of the bills I now have.  She is doing better but there are still everyday struggles that we are dealing with.  I’m working on a budget now – hopefully that will help make the money go further.  I had a budget before but it definitely wasn’t working.  I’m about to try and sell my van – that would free up nearly $500//month.  Yes you read that right – I have a huge car payment.  I have some land for sale.  I even have a buyer.  But he has to sell his land before he can buy my land.  I’ve been waiting all year knowing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel but right now it is hard to keep that light in my sights.  Keep your fingers crossed that his land sells soon – it will make a world of difference in my life.

Lately I feel a lot like Debbie Downer.  In general I’m an optimistic sort – but it has been awhile since I’ve felt that optimism.  Everyday I feel a huge weight on my shoulders and I feel depressed.  I’m going through the motions of life just looking for things to get better.  I need to shake off this malaise and be more proactive in getting things done. I’ll start with this blog (again!) and use that as my first step to getting back to a better state of mind……

One thought on “Management

  1. Howdy, Read your latest post and sorry to hear your property hasn’t sold yet and finances will continue being a problem until that occurs. If you are able to sell your van and eliminate the $500 a month payment that would help a lot. If the sale is delayed you might bring the van to a car max for an offer on your vehicle (if there is a car max near you). Last time I traded cars I got an offer from car max before I went in to trade vehicles. Car max offered me more for my car than the dealership was willing to offer me for my car on a trade in, What they do is make an offer on your car and give you 1 week to accept the offer or the offer becomes invalid. At least at that point you will know approximately what you can expect to get for the vehicle. Normally car max offers you the value of the car less $1,000. The $1,000 more than offered is the price they put on the car when it is put on their lot for sale. You might also check the blue book value of the van and that will give you a good start point. I think I’ve told you before that Kate and I had a very tight budget when we first got married. At that time the Army only paid once a month. When I got paid, Kate would pay all our outstanding bills and whatever was left over had to be stretched out until the next pay day. She made contact with our creditors and insured all our payments came due at the 1st part of the month. Kate was much better at managing money than I was. I pray for Kaileigh and Lance and their weight difficulties. I have been blessed and have never had any major weight problems other than after my radiation treatments. At the time I just couldn’t eat or hold down food, I lost a lot more weight than desired (got down to 115 pounds and that’s too light for me). After I got my appetite back I have leveled off between 145 and 150 and that’s a good weight for me. Everyone here is doing fine, Tisha was over Thursday and I always enjoy her visits. We are getting a lot of rain today so I suppose I’ll just stay in and relax today. It has cooled off a good deal here, if it weren’t for all the leaves falling from the trees into my pool this would be my favorite season of the year. I have all my Halloween decorations up and several folks have complimented me on how well the yard looks. Guess I’ll close for now, I enjoyed your new post. Hope you and the grand-kids have a blessed and joyful week-end.All My Love, Jess

    Date: Fri, 23 Oct 2015 04:57:55 +0000 To: jessrlindsey@hotmail.com

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