As I sit here tonight, I have such a feeling of accomplishment and peace. I went to my office and cleaned out an accumulation of odds and ends from the last 38 years. I feel good about having picked up my stuff; not so good about how many boxes of stuff that I picked up! I was lucky that two coworkers helped me. It would have taken me a week to get everything out but with help, it took about 2 hours! I hope to go through the boxes and donate my books and anything else I think are of use to someone. All I really wanted was my build-a-bears and associated clothing along with my tax information and photos. What I ended up with was a carload of boxes containing everything from pens and pencils to make-up and magnets. I also filled several bags with garbage (but I didn’t bring those home!). I’m afraid I didn’t throw nearly enough away based on the number of boxes I brought home. This whole process of leaving my job has left me feeling uneasy as if I had forgotten something. But cleaning out my office has brought me a sense of peace and completion. That in itself is a huge accomplishment for me.
This afternoon, I began working on my garage. My garage is full of things I can’t bear to part with right now. But with the cleanup of my office, I am feeling like clearing things out and I quickly filled a garbage can with treasures I finally saw in a clear light. While I have this feeling, I wish I had the money to rent a dumpster. As it stands, I am limited by how much I can throw away in my city-issued garbage cans. Those fill up quickly when you are clearing out an accumulation of things from the last 50 years (it includes a lot of things from my parents as well). But with my retirement money not starting until mid-March, I have a few weeks in which money will be scarce; renting a dumpster would not be a good use of the limited funds that I have right now. I was hoping to clean out a corner in which I could put my office boxes. After an afternoon of work I now realize that it might take awhile to clear that corner so tomorrow, I’m just going to empty the car. But I am proud of how much I got done in the garage today.
I have been feeling a bit underwhelmed by where I am in life. It is easy to slip into a depressive funk where getting out of bed is a challenge. Today showed me that I can get a feeling of accomplishment by working on tasks that I have been putting off for far too long. The amount of work I get done isn’t necessarily a yardstick for feeling as if I’ve achieved something; just getting started and plugging away at a task improves my outlook on life. I plan to continue picking daily tasks and working on improving my surroundings which in turn will improve my attitude…….